At the pickup point at Auckland on 9 February for a trip to South Island, we found that our Ford Econovan registration number RO 7178 had two near-bald and certainly illegal tyres which were replaced reluctantly

by the company, only when I advised them that I was a retired Scottish police officer. We declined their quite bizarre offer to get new tyres fitted ourselves en route and at their expense!

The clapped out engine involved constant use of lower gears even on minor hills with everyone and his dog overtaking us, plus constantly intrusive engine rev noise. Fuel consumption was horrendous (five refills between Auckland and Christchurch), and the smell of petrol fumes was a constant companion. Ascending the likes of Arthur’s Pass would have been probably only accomplished in reverse gear as per the classic dunes scene in the war film “Ice Cold in Alex”.

The interior was elderly (acceptable) but unclean (not). The securing lock was broken on the sliding side windows and the pre-damaged ignition key snapped in normal use. A worn gas regulator connection had been crudely repaired with thick ‘plumbers tape’ and leaked potentially fatal fumes on being turned on.

A promised “refund” at Christchurch transpired to be nothing better than compensation for two days lost, strictly as per the hire contract. We dumped the vehicle there as patently unfit for purpose. My teacher wife’s dream retiral holiday from Scotland, was ruined. But we finally got a full refund - only after our ultimatum of immediate legal action under Health and Safety and Consumer Protection laws.

Go Wild? Never again.

Reviewed almost 15 years ago